Survival guide for fathers to be
10 steps to becoming the dream partner.
In a time where the woman you once knew is now a raging hormonal emotional mess, as wonderful as it is expecting a child together, it can be hard to know how to act around a pregnant woman. And when the baby arrives you are dealing with a new mum. Those aren't exactly not easily offended either. So here's some advise on how to treat a pregnant woman or a new mom.
1. Don’t ask her why she is tired.
This should be obvious, and it does not help the situation when you are questioning why she is tired, like you think she is lazy. She is not lazy. If she is pregnant, she is making a human. That means she could do nothing else for the whole entirety of the pregnancy and STILL do more than you. If she is a new mom, she is probably close to losing it over lack of sleep, so asking something like this could make her snap completely and start throwing things. At you.
2. Don't ask her how much weight she has gained. Instead, say something along the lines of "you look so beautiful". "Are you sure you are getting enough food?"
3. Don't suggest to watch sad, scary or even mildly tragic films.
You will regret it. Stick to Disney or romantic comedies or whatever always makes her smile and laugh to be on the safe side. Anything involving children of any age getting the least bit upset is a no go. Her empathy levels towards kids are through the roof at this point, and even watching the news can be to much.
4. Give her chocolate.
Or whatever her favorite treat is. This advice can be used for whenever time in the future as well, pregnant or not. You really can't go wrong with this.
5. Don't stress her.
Pregnant women can react very badly to stress, and be extra sensitive to it. If she seems stressed, try to calm her, or if you can't think of what to say or do, just be quiet or do nothing. Being there can be a comfort on its own.
6. Tell her she is doing a great job.
She will be grateful if you tell her that you are proud of her for taking such good care of the baby. It means the world at this point in life for her.
7. Trust her judgement.
Don’t second guess the pregnant woman or the new mom. She already has so many doubts about her self as a mother or mother to be. By the time she is done googling, talking to her friends, talking to her mother, googling, talking to her self, googling, and finally reaches a conclusion, please try to trust her, at least give her a chance to give her way a try before you intervene or comment.
8. Stop saying "we are pregnant".
Are you getting bigger every day and are you going to give birth? No. So don't say you are pregnant. You can say that you are expecting a child.
9. Allow her to complain that her life is boring. Don't suggest she can still have just as much fun even when she is pregnant, that she can still go out to parties and enjoy herself the same way. You don't know how it's like to be a huge, sober balloon at a party when everyone's drunk around you, smelling and bumping into you. She wants to be home with Netflix and chill. And by chill I mean chill out, relax, don't get any funny ideas.
10. Help her.
Ask her if she needs anything, help out around the house, get her water, get her food, get her a blanket or a pillow. And when the baby arrives, help her to get some extra sleep. It's probably going to make her love you more, because after the baby arrives, sleep is suddenly worth more than all the worlds diamonds and gold. If the baby hasn't arrived yet, you might not understand now, but you will. Trust me. You will.